Anyhoo, I've decided that Death actually has a lot of potential for humor. For example, visit the Darwin Awards website and read accounts of people who "bought the farm" in an unintentionally hilarious manner. Yes, some of those examples are just plain tragic and sad....and I certainly don't mean to laugh at the family's pain and suffering. But sometimes you just have to laugh or go insane. While I realize my current mental state may be up for debate, I've decided to return to my sarcastic roots and enjoy the sublimely ridiculous.
In that frame of mind, I started thinking about idiotic ways to die (its surprising how many idiotic ways to die first begin with someone stating, "Get me another beer!"). While I suppose one could argue that Death itself is idiotic, nevertheless, some people exit stage left in a funny way. 1 Such thoughts led me to my next idea: wonder what those people said right before they met with fate? Speculation was rampant. Here are just a few:
Great Last Words:
- Hey, guys! Watch this!
- Hold my beer. I'm gonna try something.
- Do you think its loaded?
- These are the edible kind, right?
- This tastes a little funny.
- Nah.....it's not flammable. I'll prove it.
- Don't worry. I know what I'm doing.
- I wonder if we can deep fry that sucker?
- Poke it with that stick again, Bubba.
- I saw this on TV....
- Isn't that just the cutest little Chihuahua?
1For example, take the gentleman who recently purchased a new sports car, only to get said car stuck on a railroad track with an oncoming train. The gentleman, thinking quickly (or not), immediately left his vehicle. Unfortunately, he then ran TOWARDS THE TRAIN shouting "Stop! Stop!" One can only surmise that he was concerned about his new car.....luckily the car received relatively minor damage. The gentleman, however, was not so fortunate. (Yes, its a true story. Look it up).
